I am the first to admit that it takes A LOT to get me mad. I don't hold grudges and usually let stuff go pretty quickly. I have realized that I'm too passive with acquaintances. I really need to start telling these people how I feel more. I did have a few toxic friends in the past that made me feel really bad and treated me like crap and I would always be understanding because they were going through a rough time. This response just made them act even worse which I don't get. Like how do you not have the self awareness to know that you are being unnecessarily mean to another person for no reason.
All the super close people in my life give me no problems at all, maybe minor annoyances here and there, but that's normal. There has been no major disrespectful moments or complete disregard for my feelings. A lot of people meet me and understand that I'm really nice and would do anything for anyone, but say they wouldn't want to be on my bad side. They would even comment they knew it would take a lot to get there, and I would agree with them.
I honestly think all of this pushing down comes from a period of my life when I was younger when my family fought a lot. I was always the peacekeeper and super understanding, so everyone had their feelings voiced but me. While it's great that I don't lash out at other people, I can't continue to be so passive with casual friends and acquaintances when they are being really inappropriate and just plain downright nasty towards me.
It's important to be the bigger person, but I'm realizing that I can be way too chill. I'm now understanding that you need to have boundaries in regards to being a bigger person. So instead of pushing down my feelings and spending a night looking like Drake and listening to The Worst by Jhene Aiko and borderline crying while eating a sandwich, Ima talk to the person and politely call them out. No need to yell because that's not my style, but they need to know how I feel. I am no longer willing to let acquaintances or casual friends act any kind of way like they have no home training and spend a day nursing my wounds when what they did was royally uncool. Yay for personal growth! Please don't let anyone do that to you. Your feelings matter :)
Showing posts with label personal. Show all posts
Showing posts with label personal. Show all posts
My Birthday Weekend
Hey! I hope everyone's having a great weekend so far! I'm not pumped to go to work today because it's been super busy lately. Last week, I had to stay late everyday last week, and I hope that doesn't happen to me this week. Last month, I celebrated another birthday and brought it in with some awesome friends. It ended up being a whole weekend event which I hadn't planned.
Boba called me at exactly 12 am the day of to sing me happy birthday. He's the sweetest thing ever^^ It was definitely a great way to start my birthday. In the morning, I received lots of loving calls and heartfelt texts on my way to work. I was so spoiled!
Later that day, my co-workers took me to lunch and bought me cupcakes. Boba and I had made plans to have a dinner date together as well. We meet up at Union Sqaure. We walked over to the Thai spot we frequent and I saw a whole table of friends!!! He planned a surprise birthday dinner for me. After dinner we went to ChickaLiscious Dessert Club. I had a doughssant and a Nutella shake. We proceeded to nerd at and hit ourselves in the feels with nostalgia at Video Games New York. The night ended with my homie Xander and backing it up in Barnes and Noble lol
The next day I had a co-birthday party at Dave and Buster's with my two Jason who was born the day before. Our friend Mark hooked us up! Everyone that came go to play unlimited games all day and have free dinner. Thank you, Mark!!! Boba and I grabbed bubble tea first and then headed over. We arrived at 7, and I immediately ran to the shooting games lol We played air hockey with six of us going head to head. It was epic!
I played DDR for the first time and fell in love!!! My boo Liana and I were on the machine for three hours. She had me hooked, now I want to buy a DDR game for my PS2 and the hard dance pads. First, I just need to get a tv for my apartment and them I'm set >_< Boba and our friend Mike had a go against each other. It was super cute because they looked so serious! Mike bought me and Jason this huge jello shot syringe. Lord, it tasted just like alcohol, no other flavors just straight vodka haha. Boba and the guys put all their tickets together to get me a Pikachu plush.
I had a wonderful birthday last year and a great one this year. I hope to keep em coming like that^^ Below you can find the video of me and Xander getting it. Remember booty poppin is fundamental! Thanks for reading!
Boba called me at exactly 12 am the day of to sing me happy birthday. He's the sweetest thing ever^^ It was definitely a great way to start my birthday. In the morning, I received lots of loving calls and heartfelt texts on my way to work. I was so spoiled!
Later that day, my co-workers took me to lunch and bought me cupcakes. Boba and I had made plans to have a dinner date together as well. We meet up at Union Sqaure. We walked over to the Thai spot we frequent and I saw a whole table of friends!!! He planned a surprise birthday dinner for me. After dinner we went to ChickaLiscious Dessert Club. I had a doughssant and a Nutella shake. We proceeded to nerd at and hit ourselves in the feels with nostalgia at Video Games New York. The night ended with my homie Xander and backing it up in Barnes and Noble lol
The gang
The next day I had a co-birthday party at Dave and Buster's with my two Jason who was born the day before. Our friend Mark hooked us up! Everyone that came go to play unlimited games all day and have free dinner. Thank you, Mark!!! Boba and I grabbed bubble tea first and then headed over. We arrived at 7, and I immediately ran to the shooting games lol We played air hockey with six of us going head to head. It was epic!
I played DDR for the first time and fell in love!!! My boo Liana and I were on the machine for three hours. She had me hooked, now I want to buy a DDR game for my PS2 and the hard dance pads. First, I just need to get a tv for my apartment and them I'm set >_< Boba and our friend Mike had a go against each other. It was super cute because they looked so serious! Mike bought me and Jason this huge jello shot syringe. Lord, it tasted just like alcohol, no other flavors just straight vodka haha. Boba and the guys put all their tickets together to get me a Pikachu plush.
Posing with the jello shot syringe. Pikachu, you been drankin?!
I randomly asked what time it was and to all of our surprise it was 1 in the morning. We didn't even realize we had been playing that long! Boba and I headed back to his apartment and passed out from tiredness. I spent the rest of the weekend engaging in geeky and nerdy activities while relaxing.
I had a wonderful birthday last year and a great one this year. I hope to keep em coming like that^^ Below you can find the video of me and Xander getting it. Remember booty poppin is fundamental! Thanks for reading!
One Year Anniversary Since Teaching in China!
It's been a year since I came back from China, and I have a very different perspective now from then. At that time I was ready for my time to end and return to the people I loved. Now that I've settled in, I can look back and reflect more. It really was an awesome, transformative experience. I think I gained more patience and confidence.
I really wanted to have a fun, super social year. In reality, I had a more of a introverted experience which isn't necessarily a bad thing. There was a nice balance of alone time and social time. I hung out with the same small group of friends and had such a great time with them. I talk to most of these people to this day. Thank you WeChat! lol
I'll be honest, initially I was upset that I didn't have the opportunity to do a lot of activities. Dongying didn't have much to offer. We really didn't go to the movies because it was super expensive. There was no way to take any kinds of classes, not even Mandarin which I wanted to study. No martial arts, no clubs, no sports, nothing. In a lot of ways it was actually better for me to have less distractions. I really got my stuff together and made some life choices. I think I was afraid to be with alone my thoughts before that point and didn't want to think about my future. I really hoped that I would go abroad and things would click and I would stay for awhile and have it all figured out. And honestly that wasn't what happened and it made me stronger.
I really wanted to have a fun, super social year. In reality, I had a more of a introverted experience which isn't necessarily a bad thing. There was a nice balance of alone time and social time. I hung out with the same small group of friends and had such a great time with them. I talk to most of these people to this day. Thank you WeChat! lol
The Three Musketeers! Remus, Dean, and I^^
I'll be honest, initially I was upset that I didn't have the opportunity to do a lot of activities. Dongying didn't have much to offer. We really didn't go to the movies because it was super expensive. There was no way to take any kinds of classes, not even Mandarin which I wanted to study. No martial arts, no clubs, no sports, nothing. In a lot of ways it was actually better for me to have less distractions. I really got my stuff together and made some life choices. I think I was afraid to be with alone my thoughts before that point and didn't want to think about my future. I really hoped that I would go abroad and things would click and I would stay for awhile and have it all figured out. And honestly that wasn't what happened and it made me stronger.